


some kind of wonderful

by allthelostsouls



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-19
Updated: 2019-07-19
Packaged: 2020-07-08 20:45:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19875832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allthelostsouls/pseuds/allthelostsouls
Summary: Bucky is having a hard time expressing his feelings. also, some Dirty Dancing references.





	some kind of wonderful

**Author's Note:**

> hi, babes! 💞 this is for [@interestedbystanderwrites](https://tmblr.co/mg_9YFf7E_pfglGa6GGSF0g) ‘ [2k MCUxDirty Dancing Challenge](https://interestedbystanderwrites.tumblr.com/post/184726256759/) and my prompt is [Some Kind of Wonderful](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jC44kHPyW5A) by the Drifters!! Congrats on your 2k, love!! 🙌🏻💓 Thank you for letting me participate. I’m hoping I did this wonderful song some justice, and that you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. a little bit unedited, as usual, so please forgive me for any mistakes.

~ ✭ ~

  


It starts with a really old video. 

She’s in the living area watching some old footage she found online of Captain America in World War I. The image is a little dark, but thanks to FRIDAY, the quality is about ten times better than when she found it. Her smile grows when she recognizes Bucky, walking right behind Steve, his gun hanging across his chest. And right on cue, both super-soldiers walk in, cracking up about something Sam’s saying. 

“What you got there?” Steve asks, recognizing the footage immediately. 

Still smiling, she moves the screen towards them so they can see better. “It’s you, _Captain_.”

“Oh, wow,” he chuckles, stepping in closer. “Bucky, your _hair_.”

“Your _jokes_ ,” she adds right after, grinning hard at him. 

Bucky snorts, shaking his head, and makes his way towards the fridge to hide his embarrassment. Steve smiles at her happily before he follows behind him. She puts the computer back on her legs and keeps on watching the footage. 

“I can’t wait until tomorrow,” Bucky’s voice comes from the computer, he’s smiling devilish as he cleans his gun lazily.

“What’s tomorrow?” the soldier next to him asks. 

“I get better looking everyday.”

She chuckles softly just as the men on the video do. She stretches her neck over her shoulder and says, “I would’ve loved to meet you in the forties.”

Bucky’s taken aback by her words, only because he realizes then that he doesn’t share the sentiment. He couldn’t stand the idea of leaving her behind. Of him being taken away, going in the ice and doing the terrible things that he was forced to do while she moves on with her life. _Without him_. 

_Holy shit_ , he thinks a few seconds after. _Where the fuck did that come from?_

  


~ ✭ ~

  


When Bucky walks back to his room after the gym, he’s not expecting to run into anyone. He’s usually the only one up this late, or he _was_ the only one until _she_ finally moved into the compound about a month ago. 

He’s drying his hair with a towel, his sweatpants hanging low on his hips, his chest on full display. His eyes are looking on the ground and his mind is focused on the song playing in his headphones, he doesn’t realize there’s someone else walking towards him until his body crashes into hers. 

“Shit,” she says as her back hits the floor. Bucky’s there to apologize and help her get up. She fixes her reading glasses and her sweater as Bucky picks up her book and takes his headphones off. He gives the book back to her and she finally looks up at him as she takes it. Bucky can hear her swallow and utter under her breath another, “ _Shit_.”

He apologizes one more time and they don’t move. Her heart is still jumping on her chest loud and strong, and her eyes are moving from his bare skin to his metal arm. She is _staring_ , but for some reason, Bucky doesn’t feel uncomfortable at all. 

“Can I?” She asks, unable to stop herself, and immediately bites her lips, thinking she might’ve overstepped, and apologizes, “I’m sorry, you don’t have to. It was a weird thing to ask.”

“No, no,” he mumbles, taking a step closer, stretching his arm towards her. “It’s okay.”

Bucky thinks that no one has ever been so interested or careful when it came to his metal arm. Her fingertips hesitate to touch the metal and her eyes fly to his face for any sign of discomfort, as if she was making sure she’s not _hurting_ him, and Bucky could cry. He closes his eyes as her fingers run down the metal, and he wishes he could really, really _feel_ it. There’s something about the whole situation that has his heart stuttering. It’s intimacy he’s not used to. It’s the feeling of being appreciated, of being cared for, of being _loved_. 

“It’s amazing, Bucky,” she whispers then, her fingers dancing along the red star on his shoulder. She moves her hand towards his chest and his breath hitches when she finds the spot where the metal connects to his skin. She watches him carefully then, his eyes shut tight and his lips trembling softly, but he doesn’t seem to be in pain, and he’s not pulling away. So, even slower she steps closer and kisses the biggest scar and—

—and Bucky moves so fast, she doesn’t register it until it’s happened—until she’s pressed up against the wall, with both of her hands pinned on top of her head and Bucky’s breathing her air, his eyes dark. 

“I’m sorry,” he whimpers as panic fills his eyes. His grip loosens, giving her the opportunity to free herself if she wanted to, but she doesn’t. She just stares up at him, waiting. Bucky swallows, and he leans in, unable to stop himself. He tries to say something, but the words won’t come out. 

“I think you’re wonderful,” she blurts out then, his eyes are so damn blue, her head’s underwater. 

Bucky leans in the half an inch he needs for their lips to touch briefly, and the grunt that escapes him is almost primal. 

“Damn it,” he says more to himself than her, pushes himself away and it’s gone in a blink, leaving her breathless and with her knees shaking. 

  


~ ✭ ~

  


It’s girl’s night in. 

When Bucky walks into the living area, he finds more people than expected. Wanda and Nat are deciding on what movie to watch, and Vision is talking to Steve, whose head is inside the fridge, looking for a drink. He’s curious when he doesn’t see her, but then he’s even more curious when he hears her laugh, followed by Sam’s. Both of them appear from behind the furthest couch, and somebody better tell him something soon. 

“C’mon, let’s just try one more time,” she pleads at him, still giggling like crazy. 

“I swear I’ll get it this time,” Sam promises. “We’ll make it our signature move.”

“Yeah?” She muses, her body ready to run. 

“Oh, yeah.”

She takes a deep breath, locking her eyes with Sam, who motions with his hands that he’s ready. She runs and leaps as Sam’s hands close around her hips, and both of them push up. Her body hangs just a little over Sam’s head for a second before she crashes down. Bucky panics when he hears the loud thud against the floor, and runs towards them to help them up. His heart calms down a little when he hears them laughing loudly. 

“What the hell is happening?” He asks then, offering both of his hands towards them. 

“They’re _dirty dancing_ ,” Nat points out then with a smug. And yes, Bucky is even more confused now. 

“Sam here _assured_ me he knew how to do the move,” she explains to him, cleaning herself up. “We’ve been at it for ten minutes now and nothing.”

“You know,” Wanda pipes in, her eyes moving from them to Nat’s. “That’s a great movie option.”

“Patrick Swayze? I say yes, please,” Nat pipes in. 

All three girls smile knowingly at each other and get comfortable on the couch as Wanda finds the movie. 

“You guys should stay,” Wanda offers then. “Sammy, you might actually learn how to do the move.”

Sam fake chuckles at her but takes a seat on the empty couch, settling in. Vision and Steve follow right after finding a spot, so Bucky thinks, _why the hell not?_ He might actually understand properly what all that was about.

Throughout the movie, Steve and Sam joke around a lot, Vision watches quietly as Wanda’s head rest on his shoulder, and the girls try really hard to hide their smiles as the _dirty_ bits come on. Apparently, even avengers get embarrassed watching other people being intimate and fall in love. 

His mind wonders about the night before then. About her fingers on his metal arm, and the way she was looking up at him like he wasn’t himself—like he wasn’t a monster. He only realizes he’s staring at her when she looks back at him, a smile playing at the corner of her lips. She looks down at her hands after a fews seconds and bites her lip, probably thinking back at the same moment. Her eyes move back to the movie, but Bucky can’t look away from her. 

_Fuck. I should’ve kissed her._

  


~ ✭ ~

  


His body jolts awake from a nightmare. 

The darkness is thick and he feels like it’s swallowing him whole, making his breathing shallow. He fights his way to the door, and practically falls on his knees on the hallway. His whole body seems to be shaking as he sits on the ground, his back against the wall. Memories flash behind his eyes, and he’s having a hard time knowing what’s real and what’s not. 

There’s the red light blinking, a soft whisper of words that shouldn’t have any effect over his mind anymore, the feeling of being tied down, and his lips trembling as he pleads, “Stop.”

The faceless man keeps whispering the words and Bucky screams trying to drown out the noise in his head. He gains power over his body and gets up quickly, his metal fist banging against his door, trying to break out a nonexistent prison, and his nightmare is nothing more than him reliving an awful memory. The man disappears once the last word is said, and Bucky stops all movement. His breathing is still accelerated and all he feels is rage.

“Bucky?”

He turns around slowly, his hands closed into fists, and his eyes are dark and cold. He straightens up, making himself look bigger, and he chuckles as he sees her arrange her stand, getting ready for a fight.

“Bucky.”

He finally recognizes her voice and his body turns to liquid then. He falls to the floor, his hand flying to his throat as if that would help him breathe better. The book she has on her hands falls with a soft thud, and then she’s on her knees in front of him, calling for him, reaching out for him. Bucky grabs her hands, desperate, and pulls her in towards his body, so she’s able to sit on his lap and close her arms tightly around him. 

“It’s okay,” she whispers in his ear, playing with his hair. “It’s just me. It’s just me, everything’s okay.”

“I’m sorry,” he sobs into her shoulder. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry...” 

Slowly, his breathing comes back to normal and his heartbeat slows down. He’s calmed down enough now, but they still stay tangled up in each other for hours. 

  


~ ✭ ~

  


The next day, Bucky goes to see Shuri first thing in the morning. He doesn’t explain anything and she doesn’t ask, they just share a quick hug and some stories, and they get to working. When he comes back late that night, she’s the first person he finds. She’s got a book on her hands, as usual, and a wide smile spreads along her face when she sees him. 

“How did it go?”  


“Fine,” he replies, trying his best to not sound unattached or rude.  


She smiles again, relieved, and Bucky thinks really hard if he should go inside his room then or not. He decides to sit next to her, instead, knowing she’s waiting for something. For him to tell her about his day or about his nightmare last night, or anything really. But he can’t. He just can’t seem to express how he’s feeling at all, and it frustrates him terribly. It’s probably written all over his face by the way her shoulders fall, and she sighs softly as she grabs his hand.

“It’s okay,” she whispers to him and it almost sounds like _no matter what’s going on, I’m on your side_. Bucky thinks his heart is going to run out of his chest through his mouth if he tries to talk because just by that simple gesture he feels... understood. So he squeezes her hand as if asking _you are?_ , and she thinks _of course I am, you idiot_ but she doesn’t say anything, she just moves close enough that their hips touch, rests her head on his shoulder and squeezes back hard.  


And he knows exactly what she means by that.

  


~ ✭ ~

  


Two months later, she goes on her fifth mission as an avenger. 

It’s her first mission with Bucky and she almost dies. 

It’s the first time Bucky sees what an skilled fighter she actually is. They were outnumbered, as usual, but it’s a breeze. She almost looks graceful as she takes them down, and her aim is just as good as his. He knows her potential, but training is a _lot_ different that being out on the field. She looks nothing like the girl he sees everyday roaming around the halls with a book on her hands. She looks rough, angry, deadly. 

She gets shot in her stomach. They know because they hear her curse loudly in the intercom, but she shakes it off until the mission is over. They only notice how bad it really is until they’re back in the jet assisting wounds, and he presses her hand down on her black tactical gear and it comes out bright red. After a few seconds the color leaves her cheeks and her body crashes against the floor loudly. 

“STEVE!” Bucky screams as loud as he can, picking her up in his arms and putting pressure on the wound to stop the bleeding. “We need to do something now!”

To say Bucky is scared is an understatement. He is _terrified_ even after the wound has been treated at the jet and the doctor at the med bay assures them she’s going to be okay, she just needs some rest. 

Bucky can’t bring himself to step into her room when she finally wakes up, so he watches Steve through the window as he comes close to her bed and pets her hair softly, getting her attention. 

“Please, _please_ don’t do something like that ever again,” he asks, his voice like honey. “You’re an excellent fighter, and an even more wonderful woman. We’re lucky to have you on our side. But you need to make sure you make it home at the end of day, even if it means taking a minute to cover a wound so you don’t bleed out. Understood?”

“Yes, sir,” she mumbles quickly, her voice rough. 

Steve can’t help but smile at her and caress her cheek as she smiles back at him. “Get some sleep, darling.”

She nods, closing her eyes, and Bucky’s almost sure she dozes off immediately. Steve walks out and closes the door quietly behind him. He holds his best friend’s shoulder to show support and waits until Bucky looks at him in the eyes to say, “She’s okay, Buck. She’s a tough girl. Don’t worry too much.”

  


~ ✭ ~

  


Everything changes after that. 

Bucky can’t really explain it. He was just so scared that she could possibly be gone, but he doesn’t understand what _exactly_ the feeling is. He’s not ignoring her, but his routine does change a little over the next few weeks. He starts doing little things like trying to work out during the day so he won’t be roaming the halls too late or maybe even get to training extra early so he gets dibs on his partner and he can get Sam or Steve. Really, he’s not ignoring her, but he might be trying to put some distance between them to figure out what the hell is going on inside his head.

  


~ ✭ ~

  


The knocking on his door is unexpected. Finding her once he opens the door even more so.

“Are you not coming to the party?” she asks, her eyes heavy with alcohol.  


“Not today, darling.”

“Mind keeping me company for a while then?”  


Bucky thinks of a million excuses then, but she’s looking at him with bright eyes and a soft smile, and he gives in. Her smile grows as she steps inside, finishing the rest of the champagne before placing the crystal glass on top of the first flat surface she finds. 

“You look beautiful,” he mumbles to cut the silent short, “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in a dress before.”  


“Thank you,” she answers cheerfully, taking a quick spin so he can see her from every angle. The silence stretches and her face hardens, waiting for Bucky to say something. When doesn’t, she asks, “What did I do wrong, Buck?”  


“Excuse me?”  


“Don’t,” she warns. “Please, don’t pretend like you don’t know what I’m talking about.”  


“I’m sorry,” he starts, his voice low. “I can’t really seem to be able to express these feelings, not even to myself.”  


“So you just push me away?”  


“That’s not what I—I just—“  


“Bucky,” she interrupts him, and Bucky can tell by her face and they way her fists close how angry she is. “I thought you trusted me.”  


“I do,” replies right away, stepping closer. “With my life, I promise. I just—I haven’t really felt this way before.”  


“It was the mission we went on together, right? That’s when it all changed. That’s when _I_ changed, isn’t it? I saw the way you looked at me before,” she points out, suddenly too embarrassed to hold his gaze. “And I see the way you look at me now—like the monster I am.”  


Bucky is speechless. His heart feels heavy in his chest and he needs to do or say something to fix this. So when she walks past him heading towards the door, panic washes over him and before he’s finished thinking about it, he closes his hand on her wrist to stop her from leaving.

“I—,” he sighs, his eyes on the floor, trying to find the words. It’s time to man up. “I’ve been on this earth for a hundred years now and I cannot recall a single moment of my life in which I was so _frighten_. I thought—I thought you weren’t gonna wake up.”  


“Bucky,” she breathes, turning to face him, and she’s on his space, pushing his chin up so he’s forced to look at her. “I promise, you’re not gonna lose me.”  


“But I almost did,” he shoots back, both of his hands closing on her arms, making her body shake with his words. “ And I was _terrified_. The way I feel towards you scares the living shit out of me. The fact that I won’t be able to always be there to protect you keeps me awake at night.”  


“I understand,” she whispers, her hands on his face, caressing his cheeks slowly. “Trust me, I _do_. But you can’t push me away because you’re scared, baby. It’d only make us miserable.”  


Bucky closes his eyes, pressing his forehead against hers and apologizes again. This time when he leans in to brush his lips against hers, neither one of them pulls away. This time, he closes his arms around her waist and kisses her deeply.

“This right here is such a wonderful place,” he breathes, holding her tight against his chest. He feels her smile against his mouth as he adds, “It’s my happy place.”  


She snorts back at him, and time seems to stop as they stand there, holding each other, breathing each other’s air until they’re so quiet that the music seems to have life of its on as it grows louder. The Drifters sing smoothly for them, and soon enough, they’re dancing.

“I _can’t wait_ until tomorrow.”

“Why’s that, sweetheart?”

She smiles devilish at him, “I get better looking everyday.”

Bucky chuckles loudly before he kisses her hard. The rest of their night is full of sweet lips, warm eyes, and soft sighs. 

_And everything seems to be some kind of wonderful._

**Author's Note:**

> find me - [xbuchananbarnes.tumblr.com](http://xbuchananbarnes.tumblr.com)


End file.
